It's been awhile - in so many ways!

I have not written for awhile, and in that time, much has happened:

1. I finished my certification for Somatic Voicework™The LoVetri Method at Shenandoah Conservatory.
2. I decided to give a recital at Carroll, which is looming on the horizon (September 23)
3. Out of nowhere, I got hired at Cardinal Stritch University as an adjunct voice instructor, working with musical theater majors and music minors.

The latter is thrilling me. The penultimate is scaring me, but not too badly. It has been at least 12 years since I gave a solo recital. Memorization is coming much less easily than it used to, and I don't think it's because of my age. I am out of practice. The last stage work I did was in 2004, and I haven't done opera chorus in over 10 years. I have done cabaret, but usually the music I've selected for those shows has been music I already knew. Or knew of, at the very least. For this recital, I have only recycled a few pieces - one from my grad recital ("Jugend und Alter"), one older audition piece ("I am easily assimilated"), two Rossini pieces from last November's MacDowell opera recital and three Weir pieces from the March Classical Celtic Concert - and I didn't memorize either the Weir nor the Rossini.

For this program, I am doing 3 Rossini pieces, all of which I intend to memorize, 3 Marx (ditto), the Chausson "Chanson perpetuelle" (not), the Weir (not), 3 musical theater pieces and Corigliano's "Dodecaphonia" (yes). I have two weeks - I think I'm getting there.

It's been awhile since I gave a recital; it's been awhile since I did a classical performance of any substantial length. It's been awhile since I auditioned.

I feel like I can attribute this stagnation to 9/11/2001.

I had an audition for an agent scheduled for 9/15. I didn't sleep the entire week leading up to the audition. I didn't practice. I just watched the cable news obsessively and trolled the internet looking for people who felt the same way. (It also was a few months after a competition in which I sang didn't go as well as I hoped - I was having some major performance anxiety in that year.)

The audition went poorly. Not a completely train wreck - just a half-hearted, un-invested effort. And after that, I just didn't care.

So on the 10th anniversary of 9/11, I resolve to care again. To sing because I'm happy, to sing because I'm free, and to sing because by GOD, I'm good at it.